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From: quraishi <quraishisul_khan@yahoo.com>
From: quraishi <quraishisul_khan@yahoo.com>
mohammedhussainquraishi
 Bismillahir Rahmanir Raheem  Assalamu Alaikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barkatuh!  Friday Nasiha And We have enjoined on man to be good and dutiful to his parents 
"And We have enjoined on man to be good and dutiful to his parents" [Soorah al-Ankaboot (29): 8] From As-Sunnah Bi-Monthly Islamic Newsletter (Issue no: 22) By Shawana Abdul Aziz and contributions by Br. Faizal Rakhangi
Parents are a blessing from Allah, the Exalted, but their presence is often taken for granted and their rights, neglected especially when they grow old and become dependant on their children. Talking harshly and rudely to parents and showing discomfort on their requests have become a norm. Whereas Islam teaches obedience and kindness to parents, fulfilling their right, preserving their honor and warns against neglecting the rights of parents. Allah says: "… fear Allah through Whom you demand your mutual (rights), and (and do not cut of the relations of) the wombs (kinship)…" [Soorah an-Nisa (4): 1] Narrated Abu Hurayrah (radhi allahu anhu), Allah's Messenger (sallallahu alaihi wa-sallam) said: "Allah created all the creatures and when He finished the task of His creation, Ar-Raham (the womb ties of relationship) said: '(O Allah) at this place I seek refuge with You from all those who sever me (i.e. sever the ties of relationship).' Allah said: 'Yes. Are you satisfied that I should hold with him who holds you and sever connection with him who severs you.' It said: 'I am satisfied.' Allah said: 'This is yours.'" Then Allah's Messenger (sallallahu alaihi wa-sallam) said: "Recite the verse if you like, 'Would you then, if you were given the authority, do mischief in the land, and sever your ties of kinship? Such are whom Allah has cursed..." [Saheeh al-Bukharee and Saheeh Muslim] Imam Ahmad recorded from Abdullah Ibn Amr (radhi allahu anhu) that Allah's Messenger (sallallahu alaihi wa-sallam) said: "The womb will be placed on the Day of Resurrection, curved like a spinning wheel, speaking with an eloquent fluent tongue, calling to severing whoever had severed it, and joining whoever had joined it." [Musnad Ahmad (2: 189)] These Ahadeeth stress the importance of proper treatment with relatives for this is a special means of attaining the nearness and the Mercy of Allah. A conduct contrary to it - neglecting the rights of the relatives is a cause of displeasure and Wrath of Allah. Thus, upholding family ties is obligatory and more so when it is a relation of the womb. The Messenger of Allah (sallallahu alaihi wa-sallam) warned against bad behavior towards parents, when he said: "Three acts will render one's deeds useless; associating others with Allah, Uquq towards parents and fleeing from the battle." [At-Tabarani] Al-Hasan al-Basri said: "Birr towards parents entails obeying their orders, except when what they order in disobedience of Allah. In contrast, Uquq entails neglecting parents and withholding one's kindness from them." [Ad-Durr al-Manthut, vol.5, p.259] Ibn Abbas (radhi allahu anhu) said: "Allah opens two doors (to Paradise) for every Muslim who is dutiful to his (or her) two Muslim parents, awaiting the reward with Allah Alone, and one door if he (or she) had one surviving parent (to who he or she is dutiful). Furthermore, if one makes one of his parents angry, then Allah will not be pleased with him until his parents forgive him." He was asked: "Even if they were unjust to their child?" He said: "Even if they were unjust." [Al-Baihaqee] He, who fulfills the duties of his parents, has thus chosen a path to Paradise and he who neglects his duties towards his parents is truly deprived from a great opportunity to enter Paradise because obeying and honoring one's parents is a means of entering Paradise. Abu Hurayrah narrated that the Prophet (sallallahu alaihi wa-salaam) said: "May he be disgraced! May he be disgraced! May he be disgraced." It was said, "Who, O Messenger of Allah?" He said, "The person whose parents, one or both of them, reach old age during his lifetime but he does not enter Paradise (by rendering due services to them)." [Saheeh Muslim (4627)] Service of parents is essential at every stage of their life; whether they are young or old. But this Hadeeth mentions their old age for the reason that in that period of their life they stand in greater need of care and service. It is a very callous offense to leave them at the mercy of circumstances when they are old, senile and depend on others for their needs. To neglect them at that stage is a major sin. Abu Bakrah Nufai Ibn al-Harith narrated, Allah's Messenger (sallallahu alaihi wa-sallam) said: "Shall I not inform you of the biggest of the major sins?" Allah's Messenger (sallallahu alaihi wa-sallam) asked this question thrice. We said: "Please, O Allah's Messenger.' He (sallallahu alaihi wa-sallam) said: "To join partners with Allah in worship and; to be undutiful to one's parents."…" [Agreed upon] One can certainly find sufficient time to take care of his parents, attend to their needs, respect them, talk to them, support them financially and emotionally, and rear his children to love them and be around them. The time spent with the parents is pleasant, listening to their stories, conversing to them about family affairs, asking for their advice, loving them and showing them affection and pleasure. How can this be considered difficult or burdensome, when the parents are the dearest person to one's heart, the shelter that he resorts to when he is sad and depressed. Islam does not command obedience only to the believing parents, but also encourages upholding the ties of kinship with disbelieving parents. Narrated Asma' bint Abi Bakr, "My mother came to visit me at the time of the Messenger of Allah (sallallahu alaihi wa-sallam) and she was a mushrikah (disbeliever). I consulted the Messenger of Allah (sallallahu alaihi wa-sallam) saying, 'My mother has come to visit me for some purpose, should I uphold ties of kinship with my mother?' He said, 'Yes, uphold ties of kinship with your mother.'" [Saheeh al-Bukharee (2477)] Such is because no child can pay back the hardships borne by his parents in raising him. Ibn Umar (radhi allahu anhu) saw a man carrying his mother going around the Kabah in Tawaf (circumambulation) and he asked Ibn Umar (radhi allahu anhu): "Have I fulfilled my duty towards her?" Ibn Umar replied: "Not even for one contraction! However, you have done good and Allah will reward you tremendously for the little that you could do." [Al-Kabair, p.42] Also, Zurah Ibn Ibraheem said that a man came to Umar (radhi allahu anhu) and said to him: "I have an old mother who is unable to go to answer the call of nature, so I carry her on my back. I also help her perform ablution while turning my face away from her (out of respect). Have I fulfilled my duty towards her?" Umar (radhi allahu anhu) said: "No." The man said: "Even though I carry her on my back and exert myself in her service." Umar (radhi allahu anhu) said: "She used to do the same for you (when you were young) while hoping that you will live, as for you - you wait when she will go away (die)." [Birr-ul-Walidain, by Ibn Jawzi] Respecting and obeying the parents is a way of showing gratitude to them. Ibn Abbas (radhi allahu anhu) said: "There are three verses that are tied to three things, and they are inseparable." He mentioned among them the verse, "…give thanks to Me and to your parents." [Soorah Luqman (31): 14] And he commented: "Whoever thanked Allah, but did not appreciate his parents, then (his thanking Allah) would not be accepted from him. This is why the Prophet (sallallahu alaihi wa-sallam) said: 'The Lord is pleased with the pleasing of the parents, and the Lord is angry with him who angers the parents.'" [Saheeh al-Jamee (3500) and Silsilah as-Saheehah (516)] The importance of honoring and serving one's parents is also known from the verses of Soorah Luqman, where Allah mentions the advice of Luqman to his son. He advices his son with kindness and good behavior to the parents next to Tawheed (worshiping Allah alone), he said as Allah mentions in the Qur'aan: "And (remember) when We took a covenant from the children of Israel, saying: 'Worship none but Allah (Alone) and be dutiful and good to parents and to kindred, and to orphans and al-Masakin (the poor)." [Soorah al-Baqarah (2): 83] Ibn Katheer (rahimahullah) commented on the meaning of this verse, "Allah has commanded the Children of Israel to worship Him Alone and shun associating anyone or anything in His worship. This He has commanded all His creation, as well, and this is why He created them. Verily, the highest and greatest right, is Allah's Right that none except Him is worshipped. After that comes the rights of creation, especially and most important, right of parents. For instance, Allah said: "Give thanks to Me and to your parents." [Soorah Luqman (31): 14] [Mukhtasar Tafseer Ibn Katheer (vol.1, p.30)] In the Qur'aan, Allah usually mentions the rights of parents along with His Right and mentioning being dutiful to parents along with worshipping Allah Alone emphasizes the rights of parents and the significance of Birr (being dutiful) towards them. "And your Lord has decreed (commanded) that you worship none but Him. And that you be dutiful to your parents..." [Soorah al-Isra (17): 23] Allah has placed rewards and blessings for the parents in their tiresome efforts of striving hard to support and rear their offspring. Similarly, Allah has placed rewards and blessings for the children for helping, serving and bringing pleasure and comfort to their parents. Kab Ibn Ujrah narrated: "A man passed by the Prophet (sallallahu alaihi wa-sallam) and the Companions were amazed at his eagerness and vigor (for seeking his means of livelihood). They said: 'O Messenger of Allah (sallallahu alaihi wa-sallam)! Might that this vitality be spend in Allah's Cause.' The Messenger of Allah (sallallahu alaihi wa-sallam) said: "If he went out to earn what he supports his young children with, then he is in the Cause of Allah. If he went out to support two elderly parents, then he is in the Cause of Allah. If he went out to support himself and preserve his honor (refrain from begging people, etc.), then he is in the Cause of Allah. If he went out for the purpose of showing-off and pride, then he is in the cause of Shaytaan." [At-Tabarani] Allah has also praised the Prophets, especially Prophet Yahya (John) (alaihi as-salaam) because he was kind to his parents in their old age. Surely, kindness in time of need is greater than at other times, and there is a great need that occurs and arises in old age and a tremendous weakness that it brings: "and (Prophet Yahya was) dutiful to his parents and he was neither arrogant nor disobedient (to Allah or to his parents)." [Soorah Maryam (19): 14] Further, Allah praised Eesa (alaihi as-salaam) because he was dedicated to serving his mother, as well as, being merciful to her. He mentioned this fact himself, when he said: "And dutiful to my mother, and made me not arrogant, unblessed." [Soorah Maryam (19): 32] So, being obedient and serving the parents is from the characteristics of the Prophets. When children dedicate sufficient time to the service of their parents, obey them and fulfill their duty towards them, especially the mother, they will earn Allah's Pleasure and enter Paradise.
The Mother is More Deserving of Honor and Respect Than the Father The mother carries the child for nine months in weakness upon weakness, bears the difficulties of pregnancy, gives birth, feeds the child and dedicates herself to his service, protecting, clothing, cleaning, etc. It is for this reason that the mother is more deserving of honor and respect than the father and more deserving of kindness, service and obedience as small compensation for her care and efforts as being three time what the father deserves. Narrated Abu Hurayrah (radhi allahu anhu): "A man came to the Prophet (sallallahu alaihi wa-sallam) and said: 'O Messenger of Allah, who among the people is most deserving of my good companionship?' He said, 'Your mother.' He asked, 'Then whom?' He said, 'Your mother.' He asked, 'Then whom?' He said, 'Your mother.' He asked, 'Then whom?' He said, 'Then your father.'" [Saheeh Bukharee (4/13) and Saheeh Muslim (2548)] Al-Hafidh ibn Hajar (rahimahullah) said: "Ibn Battal said what this means is that the mother should be honored three times more than the father. He said that is because of the difficulties of pregnancy, then giving birth, then breast-feeding. These are hardships that are experienced only by the mother, then the father shares with her in raising the child. This is also referred to in the verse: "And We have enjoined on man (to be dutiful and good) to his parents. His mother bore him in weakness and hardship upon weakness and hardship, and his weaning is in two years, give thanks to Me and to your parents. Unto Me is the final destination." [Soorah Luqmaan (31): 14] This Hadeeth also implies that in cases where her husband is poor and not able to spend on her, then the son has to spend on his mother and she will be given precedence over the father."
Duaa you can perform for your Parents  "My Lord! Bestow on them Your Mercy as they did bring me up when I was small." [Soorah al-Isra (17): 24]   "My Lord! Forgive me, and my parents, and him who enters my home as a believer, and all the believing men and women. And to the Zalimun (polytheists, wrong-doers, and disbelievers, etc.) grant You no increase but destruction!" [Soorah al-Jinn (72): 28] "And your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him. And that you be dutiful to your parents. If one of them or both of them attain old age in your life, say not to them Uff (a word of disrespect), nor shout at them but address them in terms of honor. And lower unto them the wing of submission and humility through mercy, and say: 'My Lord! Bestow on them Your Mercy as they did bring me up when I was young.'" [Soorah al-Isra (17): 23] "In this verse, Allah specifically mentioned rearing or bringing up, so that children remember the tremendous kindness and care their parents had while rearing them, might that they feel pity and kindness towards their parents. We should mention that Allah has disallowed invoking Him for forgiveness for dead disbelievers. Therefore, if the parents of a Muslim were Christians or Jews, he or she must deal with them in the manner that Allah ordained except invoking Him for mercy for them if they died while still disbelievers." [Ahkam-ul-Quraan by al-Jassas, vol.2, p. 236] Conclusion - Important lessons: 1. Obedience to parents, serving and caring for them in their old age is obligatory on the child, just as the parents brought him up with love and care in his childhood, irrespective of whether the parents are believers or unbeliever 2. Disobeying and neglecting the right of parents is incurring the Wrath of Allah and uttering words of disrespect to them is a major sin. 3. The child should prefer the pleasure of his parents over his own pleasure and the pleasure of his wife, children and all people except the Prophet. 4. The child should obey his or her parents in all what they order him or her to do or not to do, even when what they demand is not suitable in their children's opinion, unless they command to disobey Allah, the Exalted. 5. The child should willingly and with a good heart grant his parents what he thinks they like or prefer even before they ask for it, all the while feeling and admitting that he has not reached perfection in fulfilling the tremendous rights on him. We should remember that the Messenger of Allah (sallallahu alaihi wa-sallam) said: "There are three types of supplications that will not be rejected (by Allah); the supplication of the parent with regard to his offspring, the supplication of a fasting person, and the supplication of a traveler." [Saheeh al-Jamee, no.3029] So, if obedience and kindness to our parents only brings their invoking Allah, it will be worthy and sufficient of directing us to eternal happiness, Insha'Allah.
Share this POST with maximum number of people you can. Guiding one soul to knowledge and faith is a momentous achievement. It is what will earn us great blessings. (Insha Allah) Jazak Allahu khairan ! With kind & humble regards, Umm Safoora |
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((( Bismillahir Rahmanir Raheem )))
~ Let there be a community among you who call to the good, and enjoin the right, and forbid the wrong. They are the ones who have success.(Qur'an, 3:104)
~ They believe in Allah and the Last Day, and enjoin the right and forbid the wrong, and compete in doing good. They are among the righteous.(Qur'an, 3:114)
~ If you avoid the serious wrong actions you have been forbidden, We will erase your bad actions from you and admit you by a Gate of Honour.(Qur'an, 4:31)
~ Help one another in birr (righteousness, virtue), and taqwa (piety, fear of Allah, God-consciousness), and do not help one another in sinning and transgression. And fear and revere Allah; verily, Allah is severe in punishment.(Qur'an, 5:2)
~ You who believe! Have fear of Allah and seek the means of drawing near to Him and strive in His way,so that hopefully you'll be successful. (Qur'an, 5:35)
~ Ask your Lord for forgiveness and then repent to Him. He will let you enjoy a good life until a specified time, and will give His favour to all who merit it. But if you turn your backs, I fear for you the punishment of a Mighty Day.(Qur'an, 11:3)
~ Strive for Allah with the striving due to Him. He has selected you and not placed any constraint upon you in the religion-the religion of your forefather Ibrahim. He named you Muslims before and also in this, so that the Messenger could be witness against you and you could be witnesses against all mankind. So perform prayer and give alms and hold fast to Allah. He is your Protector-the Best Protector, the Best Helper. (Qur'an, 22:78)
(((Subhan-Allahi Wa-Bihamdihi, Subhan-Allahil Azeem)))
~ Let there be a community among you who call to the good, and enjoin the right, and forbid the wrong. They are the ones who have success.(Qur'an, 3:104)
~ They believe in Allah and the Last Day, and enjoin the right and forbid the wrong, and compete in doing good. They are among the righteous.(Qur'an, 3:114)
~ If you avoid the serious wrong actions you have been forbidden, We will erase your bad actions from you and admit you by a Gate of Honour.(Qur'an, 4:31)
~ Help one another in birr (righteousness, virtue), and taqwa (piety, fear of Allah, God-consciousness), and do not help one another in sinning and transgression. And fear and revere Allah; verily, Allah is severe in punishment.(Qur'an, 5:2)
~ You who believe! Have fear of Allah and seek the means of drawing near to Him and strive in His way,so that hopefully you'll be successful. (Qur'an, 5:35)
~ Ask your Lord for forgiveness and then repent to Him. He will let you enjoy a good life until a specified time, and will give His favour to all who merit it. But if you turn your backs, I fear for you the punishment of a Mighty Day.(Qur'an, 11:3)
~ Strive for Allah with the striving due to Him. He has selected you and not placed any constraint upon you in the religion-the religion of your forefather Ibrahim. He named you Muslims before and also in this, so that the Messenger could be witness against you and you could be witnesses against all mankind. So perform prayer and give alms and hold fast to Allah. He is your Protector-the Best Protector, the Best Helper. (Qur'an, 22:78)
(((Subhan-Allahi Wa-Bihamdihi, Subhan-Allahil Azeem)))
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